Creative Life Midwife

Inspiring Artistic Rebirth

Instant Writing Improvement: Have Fun With Writing

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Here are two reasons to be more specific with your writing. The first reason includes all your writing and communication. The second reason to be specific with your writing is about creating and living life as a content creator or maker.

I will be sharing in my stories and vides about these topics as we gear up for next week’s #5for5BrainDump. Check the link in my profile to register for that free program.

In order to make your writing better, be as specific as possible.

  1. Julie drives a blue car.
  2. Julie drives a midnight blue Mazda.
  3. Julie drives a midnight blue Mazda CX5 that is parked in a driveway in Bakersfield, California.

In order to create a life as delightful as possible, speak and write of how you want to feel using as many different descriptive words as possible.

  1. I am excited to be as productive as possible.
  2. I am delighted to see what content I may create that will change other peoples’ lives, and the world, for the better.
  3. My enthusiasm is contagious when I share on multiple platforms and realize how easy this is to be consistent and continue to move forward, with love, always.

Suggestion: Draw a circle in the middle of a blank sheet of paper.

Write the name of the object in the circle and then free associate all the ways you could describe the object. Allow yourself to notice the tiniest little bit of description. Witness the object with multiple senses.

See how it looks, hear how it sounds, feel the weight or density when you touch it.

To go more deeply with your description, compare it to other objects.

The last step in this first stage is to associate your memories either with the specific object or an object similar to it. With the car example, I might write about memories in another car I owned. Lately I’ve been thinking about my high school friend, Susan, so perhaps I’ll write about my Ford Cortina or the Volvo Station wagon she used to drive. For now… I am going to play with writing more specifically.

I’ll be back tomorrow with more writing improvement tips for you. 

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via her programs, playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed media whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives.

Her life changing, free #5for5BrainDump programs are available to you this Summer by visiting this link.

To contact Julie to schedule a Writing or Creative Life Coaching Session, call or text her at 661.444.2735.

Be sure to check out  her social media channels in the links above, especially if you find the idea of a Word-Love Party bus particularly enticing.

 

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Create Your Own Retreat: Whether You Have an Hour, a Weekend or 5 Minutes a Day!

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What prevents you from experiencing the positive experiences of a sacred or creative retreat?

What I hear most often is “I don’t have the time” or “I can’t afford to go…”

Can you imagine another option?

Watch this short video for ideas to use right now.

Next week we’re creating a Virtual Retreat with #5for5BrainDump. This is your perfect chance to try out what you’ve seen on the video!

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Out in the Great Beyond Woo Woo: Having Fun with Factual because who pushes applecarts anymore, anyway?

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What does it mean to be “woo woo”?

I learned today from google that “woo woo” is a cocktail that sounds pretty darned yummy and what I was looking for was a classification of people or the way some people experience… again caught in a web of words.

It is almost a pejorative when someone says “woo woo”. When I say it,  I am often describing myself, the mystical me – the one who believes in a sort of alternate way at times that people who are more linear or scientific or stodgy might not understand. They might say I am cooky or nuts or… out there.

See, words can be tricky.

This is how it relates back to the Untalkaboutables.

I remember before Samuel was diagnosed with autism. I didn’t want to talk about his autism in certain circles because I could hear them say things like “don’t use labels” even in a movie I loved recently they kept saying “quirky” instead of autism. A women behind me said “He has autism.”

When we dance around or use metaphor or refuse to face what is so – we cloak that topic in being wrong and our mind hears “wrong” and this can be, at least, frustrating to those of us who thrive on accuracy and damaging to those of us whom “people pleasing” flows through our veins whispering “don’t do it wrong, don’t upset the apple cart”.

Who even pushes an apple cart anymore? Who even uses an apple cart anymore?

Practice in talking:

1. Practice being as factual in your conversation as possible.

2. If you are uncomfortable with just starting being factual, add a preface in your conversation – something like “I am attempting to be as succinct and close to the facts as possible, like an old-time journalist be.”

3. Do the opposite: be as ridiculously, flagrantly un-factual as possible in your conversation. This is actually a lot of fun and quickly brings us back to the facts.

And as always, we may start this practice with our writing. Take the three steps above from conversation and write them, instead.

I would love to hear from you about your progress with talking about your “Untalkaboutables”. Please comment your thoughts, experiences with woo woo and/or applecarts and maybe you would benefit from watching  more on my YouTube channel, too.  This particular video is about the twisting, curvy road of transformation. Take a moment to watch this video and then subscribe over there as well.

 

 

 

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Still Here, and That’s Just Fine…. Shifting the Fear Narrative

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Today I used a quote as a writing prompt, simply writing whatever flew off the ends of my fingertips in response.

I wrote this short essay in five minutes and maybe two more, to bring it to conclusion.

It was written in #5for5BrainDump style and I am thrilled to announce our next #5for5BrainDump session has been scheduled to begin June 18. Come back tomorrow for a link to the free sign up page. (Woeful mailing list issues).

Now, wisdom from Carolyn Myss, a different child-like version of me and a surprisingly… well, just me-me.

“Do you really want to look back on your life and see how wonderful it could have been had you not been afraid to live in?”
Caroline Myss

This quote hits me like a shocking slap to the face.

Ouch. Sting. I reach for my face – my heart shaped scar, the tears that want to pour out but stay continually stuck. Frozen.

I do not want to look back on my life and see fear everywhere.

I have stopped saying the word “want” as much as possible.

My aim is to look back and be satisfied, even with the fear-filled moments.

There is a little how do I describe her – a little contrarian Julie sitting on my right shoulder who wants to defend me. “Do you know what Julie has been through? She deserves to be afraid. She has earned a holy fear. Seriously, do you know her stories?”

I want to shush her, it’s embarrassing, and I remember Adam, my twice-time counselor saying something similar. “Give yourself a break, Julie” and I look back into my memory and say. “But Adam, I am still here. I am still here.”

I am thrilled to look back at my life in ten years and say. “This is that time when I transformed. This is the time when I chose differently.” (I wanted to say ‘finally’ and I controlled myself.)

All of the fear mongering experiences have served me, strangely, in adding a more compassionate side and gaining multitudes of life. I continually learn about self-forgiveness and compassion. I could have a PhD (at least) in patience.

I’m a grief expert, and my shortcomings – not wanting to create more strife or have confrontations or let go – these are areas I recognize and continue to work on.

When I look back at my life, I see purple. I smell lavender and juniper and surprisingly moist soil and last year’s leaves. I hear birds– familiar and not-so-much, pencils scratching on paper, and I see smiles slowly breaking across faces and eyes crinkling up. I see tears: of awe and bitter sadness.

A quiet voice inside just said. “and you did your best.”

That earlier contrarian Julie is in disagreement.

I am choosing to let go of the frustrated nihilist child and am willing to nod in agreement.  I’m willing to receive the assessment, “I did my best.”

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Reaching for the Just Right Word: What We Don’t Say… The Untalkaboutables… Keep Us Stuck

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This post was written in two successive #5for5BrainDump sessions with several editing sessions. It started stream-of-consciousness and came back with – how to state this clearly.

For now, two hours, dishes done, conversations with Emma in process, a little mopping of the kitchen floor and moisturizing my face – it is done. For now. >> See Julie smile a slight smile of acceptance.<<

Now for the Rewriting of the Narrative:

If I had my way I would climb into a bubble with a caretaker and a loving team of comrades to support me by doing what I am not gifted at doing or simply don’t like to do.

I look up and see a cobweb in front of me and I think, “I need to sweep away that cobweb when I’m done writing.”

Here’s the thing: normally I wouldn’t confess to seeing a cobweb for fear it might make me look bad and that one small choice to not be authentic and not tell the truth and not be real starts building a leaning tower that slowly and surely degrades so much of what is true and right and crackly and painful and hilarious and embarrassing and endearing and very possibly even loveable.

That saying nothing, that holding back what we have deemed “Untalkaboutable” puts us in a stranglehold.

I remember a session I had with not my most recent therapist but the one before her. I was concerned about my self-destructive behavior so we talked for 45 minutes before I showed her my arm. My forearm, wracked with deep scratches and bruises I had levied upon myself in deep frustration days before. Scratches I kept hidden because I didn’t want anyone to see the evidence left behind from not talking about what was at the root of my upset, the core of my being.

I take a breath as I continue to write, as I attempt to continue to write.

I fold my hands first in the traditional protestant prayer and then in a more eastern “Namaste” expression… praying for the boldness to keep “talking” on the page, to please continue this pattern of progress simply because my old way of being would be to skate along the surface and only occasionally go deep enough to be restorative.

“Change the language” a sort of command or request bubbles up from deep within:

I am grateful for my relationship with prayer, that I know I may always turn to prayer for comfort and guided action. Prayer says, “I am not alone, even if there are no humans around I feel safe enough to speak my depths to, there is always divinity and there is always the page.”

I am indicating that here. I am taking back my sovereign crown from here by writing these words here, dropping them one letter at a time, allowing the thoughts and meaning and letting go to bring what wants to be said into the open, into the light, and then shared with others so that they may be recognized and be willing to be stand up, to speak, to be heard.

Sometimes the page is a prayer. The page is bigger than a human and on the road to divinity.

The timer went off without me knowing, as sometimes happens lately I believe a divine thing and a call to go deeper with my writing.

Leave the keyboard and move to replace need, want, must, have to, should into excited, grateful, pleased, anticipation

Note to self and you: this is normally when I abandon my writing, when I stop going any deeper with my words because it looks and feels scary and I don’t want to face whatever might come next. In so doing, I have missed a lot of light, a lot of hope, a lot of joy and who knows what else.

Back at the keyboard, I take a few moments to write:

I found these words, replacements to the “lack” words I listed above….

Instead of “I want, I need, I am missing” in the future remember to use, “I am inspired by the possibility of,” and “I am exhilarated to think…” and “I am stirred up with anticipation of….” along with the base words of  motivated, roused, excited, activated,.enchanted…

Instead of “worried” or “afraid” or the like, “I am appreciative of the opportunity to” and “I am thankful for this moment because…” and “I am content with purely…. (being here now, feeling this moment completely, having what I have…” along with my favored “I am looking forward to” and “I am most satisfied by…”

I realize as I wrote any and all of these may be writing prompts, too, to gain more clarity.

I look up from the list and see where I have swept away the cobwebs when I was in between moments of writing. Small bites, baby steps, sweet moments of satisfaction I may point to as evidence and not be ashamed.

I hear my neighbor’s dog bark. I think how many years have gone by without sharing niceties, such a simple thing. I look forward to a time when I feel more mutual compassion with neighbords. I remember when… one of my cats got stuck under their house when they were getting work done on it.

The wife was known for complaining about how much she hates cats.

I remember feeling panic about my cat, Tina, being trapped and how we could possibly get her out. Samuel came with me and we brought a can of tuna to coax her. I was worried about getting any dust specks on their hard wood floor. I was afraid when Samuel came out from under the house he would leave traces of dust or worse, dirt, and they would be made at me (as if that was anything unusual.)

We could hear Tina meow from under the house. Samuel crawled into the space under their house. She wouldn’t come, she was scared, too.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we collectively stopped being afraid?

I keep hearing my neighbor’s voice, he must have sensed my worry and fear and he said to me repeatedly, “Julie, no harm no foul,” after Samuel successfully encourage the kitty to come to the surface and allow herself to be rescued.

I remember fighting tears then like I am fighting them now.

I hear my neighbor’s voice now, talking about the dog.

Emma seems worried because I am crying.

It sounds like the word prayer is said. I don’t know if it was or it wasn’t though perhaps I’ll claim it.

Old Narrative: People who don’t like me are always ready to find me in the wrong and make me feel more shame than I already do, naturally.

New Narrative: People are people, each with weaknesses and strengths and mostly self-absorbed.

New Narrative Question: What untalkaboutable subjects are calling me to pay attention? What small step may I take to wash away the fear as well as bring the untalkaboutable into the light?

From the italicized: Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we collectively stopped being afraid? our prompt: “What may I choose to do daily (or near daily) to lessen my day-to-day fear or anxiety?”

Devote 5 minutes daily to take action on any new insights you have from this experience. 

Are you interested in reading more about Rewriting Narrative: Below is a list of three recent posts to visit and read;

  1. Mindshift from “I’m a Bother to I’m a Blessing”
  2. Move from Destabilizing Fear into Sweet Courage
  3. Free Yourself from Banishment: Express, Strengthen, Heal, Awaken

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via her programs, playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed-media artist  whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in soon!

 To contact Julie to schedule a Writing or Creative Life Coaching Session, call or text her at 661.444.2735.

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Fuzzy Morning Brain Does Not Have to Lead to a Bad Day

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Today I woke up fuzzy. My old narrative would have fussed and scrolled around facebook and felt negative about not getting enough done. This morning, instead, I decided to start fairly early with a 5 minute brain dump session.

I decided a quote would be good inspiration and when I first looked for a quote about clarity and found lots of clichés and quotes that sounded more like drill-sergeant-speak I did a different search term (which I’ve forgotten) and found this: 

“Can anything be sadder than work left unfinished? Yes; work never begun.” — Christina Rossetti

I woke up this morning hours before I finally lifted myself out of bed. I don’t know when exactly it was and I don’t think I slept very deeply or sweetly in the interim, I just know eventually the sky got brighter and Samuel started moving about and I knew I needed to rise and shine and do something.

After the bare essentials were complete and I returned home, I still felt that struggly feeling of “What do I do?” (When this particular narrative line is repeated in fast succession and at all based in fear… anxiety rises).

I knew there was a list somewhere (Life Guideline#1 I attempt to live by is to write a possibility list before I go to sleep. I hadn’t on that day. ).

Even as I drove Samuel to school I attempted to prioritize in my mind and again and I got nowhere.

So now, I write, and I think, and I throw words down in attempt to clear my mind and allow myself the space to move forward.

This week has been about getting things done: curating and completion. I have curated and I haven’t done much completion. There is a part of me that feels like a failure and I know where I might have made different choices and gotten more completed.

I can’t change those choices I made before, but I can change what happens next.

My eyes scan back up to the quote I started with as inspiration:

Christina Rossetti said, “Can anything be sadder than work left unfinished? Yes; work never begun.”

The timer goes off so I will use the next three or so minutes to make my list. The first thing I will do is create an attractive, artful “Possibility list” to continue the kick start.

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via her programs, playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and  mixed-media artist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in soon!

To contact Julie to schedule a Writing or Creative Life Coaching Session or to request she speak at your next event, call or text her at 661.444.2735

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Transforming Panic to Love-Based Focused Action: 5 Minutes of Writing Magic

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Welcome! We’re taking an adventure in Personal Growth and Transformation Made Simple.

This is where the miracle creating #5for5BrainDump Process meets the inner working of discovering one’s unconscious beliefs otherwise known as “Rewriting One’s Inner Narrative: 5 Minutes at a Time” . Today I felt myself going down the well-worn path of panic mode, so I quickly recovered and shifted onto a different path via writing – and breathing – and what you see next is us taking that path, together so… let’s do this…

It is so easy to go into panic mode, to worried mode to “oh no I have so much to do what am I going to do oh no oh no oh no!”

Cue the Chicken-little scene, “The sky is falling, the sky is falling,” and then – if we are lucky – a hint of mindfulness seeps in.

I was having tea with my dear friend Kathi this morning and we were talking about that panic mode we sometimes unconsciously fall into and she reminded me how good I am at stopping, taking a breath, and refocusing and/or reframing and coming back to center.

It was one of those moments where I almost wanted to look over my shoulder to see who she was talking about but no, she meant me, loud and clear – me.

Ironic, then, a couple hours later when I was settling back into work mode I got nervous again about what to do next. I have a huge list and I have tasks galore and I was reviewing the content next to go up on the curation block and I got lost in the murky swamp of “What’s next?” even now – I am more than slightly worried thinking about the next thing after this thing so I stop myself.

I close my eyes.

Hand on heart.

What is the best next thing to do?

What task will get me closer to my goal most efficiently and effectively?

Hand on heart… breathe in….. exhale anxiety and blend with love… breathe in…. “What task will get me closer to my goal?”

As I rid myself of the uncomfortable anxiety and allow the light of love to take the reigns, the next step becomes more clear and I know –

The best next thing to do.

A smile crosses my face.

The timer goes off and I know.

I’ve effectively, for now, replaced the nearing panic mode with feeling peace mode.

I’ve rewritten the “Chicken-little-sky-is-falling” rule with “Focus on what’s best next, with love” and it feels so much better.
There is more to come on this one. Stand by for more….

This post was written #5for5BrainDump style: write for 5 minutes, free flow, stream of consciousness style and see what wisdom comes as  a result. This one is definitely a keeper – one I will continue to grow upon. Thank you for reading today! Please follow me on social media so you won’t miss anymore high quality content that will help as you work toward a better and better life now.

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via #5for5BrainDump, livestream broadcasts, creativity playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed media artist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in soon!

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How to Use Your Subconscious Mind to Fall (Back) in Love with Time

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Welcome! This is where the miracle creating #5for5BrainDump Process meets the inner working of discovering one’s unconscious beliefs otherwise known as “Rewriting One’s Inner Narrative: 5 Minutes at a Time” Personal Growth and Transformation Made Simple… today I found it important to explore my relationship with time… something I used to love. Now? 

The time when I was the most productive was when I repeated this mantra to myself, “There is plenty of time to do all that I most need to do.”

When I simply said those words to myself throughout the day, everything miraculously got done or I just let go what remained unfinished.

I almost whined at myself just now, “Why don’t I do this anymore?” and then I remembered, the “Why” isn’t important, the “What shift will be most productive?” is more beneficial.

I was searching for quotes from women about time management and all I found were trite clichés like “Don’t sweat the small stuff” and “Take time for yourself.”

I don’t know about you, but I feel like I have heard these so many times and yet when we are deluged with a calendar that is so full we find ourselves stapling our finger at 3 am in order to finish a project on time the last thing on your mind is taking time for yourself. That is, other than collapsing into your bed once the next day is over.

If I go back to my writing from earlier in the week, I see a lot of rewriting unworthiness and quite a bit of self-malaise. By the way, I have written myself as an expert on the topic of self-love and self-care. What I am addressing now is deeper than the surface stuff – this is why I am working on this re-writing because years of surface stuff doesn’t begin to scratch the sludge coating over what is most significant.

Odd. My timer didn’t chime, so I am going to reset it for one minute to finish up.

I feel as if there must be something important wanting to be written.

Time is measureable, it is finite.

It is ironically gloriously expansive when we return to the beginnings here. I am most productive when I repeat “There is plenty of time,” throughout the day.

My subconscious nods in agreement and delivers plenty.

I am realizing again (a theme as I started writing these thirty days) how much I may protect my continued and continuing progress when I stop spending time with people and projects that don’t align with these sorts of thought process.

Sometimes self-love includes who we are allowing in – as they reflect our beliefs as well.

Love, not lament, is what will help us to remember to appreciate and facilitate productivity in this time we are in – five minutes, five days, five weeks or years… at a time.

(There, that’s the reason for the extra minute!)

And now, for you – 

Writing Prompt – set your timer for five minutes and write…..

My relationship with time is like….

I was most organized with time when….

Share a cliche piece of writing advice you have received and refresh that cliche with what you have learned to be true – 

Write a time story, as if time was a person or entity…

 

Check back as I may add layers to this because… I will confess… I like these prompts I just wrote for you!

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via #5for5BrainDump, livestream broadcasts, creativity playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed media artist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in soon!

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How to Shift Those Deep Beliefs – Unworthy – Rewriting the Narrative

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Rewriting one’s narrative  – sometimes called “inner tapes” or “self talk” or many other catch phrases is an important part of personal transformation for everyone.

Studies have proven this strategy works so therapists and life coaches and healers have prescribed a variety of processes for people seeking improved lives to shift from the old thinking to a renewed, much better life. 

I have taken on a personal challenge to re-frame my less-than-constructive narrative thought processes here as a means to inspire and stay accountable because when I have done so in private, I tend to do the push-me-pull-you-oops-I-forgot-it-again-thing, which I try not to have as an ongoing project. My aim? To feel better than ever AND to inspire you in the process. Please, join me now, as I take it on 5 minutes at a time for the next 30 days. You may listen to me read aloud on my podcast as well by clicking here.  

 

You might have noticed this buried in my last blog post:

It isn’t a sweet dissatisfaction I normally feel, but a deep tainted dye that spreads over me – based upon none other than that damn narrative that runs through my veins, “You don’t deserve to do well, you need to seek penance constantly for all your wrong doings.”

I chose today to write five minutes more – to continue to work with this not only deeply dyed but also deeply rooted belief, actively poisoning my possibilities.

This is an example of narrative I came face-to-face with – or fingers to the keyboard in stream-of-consciousness and then to my awareness…. that invited me to go deeper.

Old narrative: “I don’t deserve to do well, I need to seek penance constantly for all my wrong doings.”

This goes in direct opposition to the views I espouse in relationship to other people. “We are all human, we all make mistakes.” I say to others, a slight smile on my face, eyes looking into eyes with warmth and compassion.

“In my business, I value mistakes, I value the slightly awkward, I appreciate the path to better, progress is the new perfection,” and on-and-on-and-on-and-on. It is time to fully honor myself within the others – make it “myself and others” on the list of who and what I value.

The only penance I may have ever needed to pay (and I don’t believe I did, when conscious and aware) has been paid by the self-flagellation I’ve been doing by not using my gifts to the extent that I might. And that, beloveds, is worthy of forgiveness as I have shown and lived over and over and over again.

How to rid myself of the “deep tainted dye that spreads over me”?

I love to dye paper to make mixed media art. It is extremely therapeutic for me to create colored paper and watch the dye merge and spread and play in ways unexpected.

To lighten the color of the dye, I add water. I add more paper to dye. I add more water. I make more paper. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

Showing up at the page and writing, exploring, allowing myself to feel the emotions and poke about in what makes me uncomfortable in containers of time and energy – these are the tools I will use.

Writing, brain dump style in 5 minute chunks. Art making. Conscious, directed and focused transformational conversations. All of these will diminish the heaviness that comes with the deeply tainted dye as I live this life and share these gifts as I was meant to all along.

Now it is your turn to let your narrative loose, to free yourself, too.

I’m here, ready to listen and share.

Always, Julie

 = = =

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via #5for5BrainDump, livestream broadcasts, creativity playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed media artist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in soon!

To contact Julie to schedule a Writing or Creative Life Coaching Session or to request she speak at your next event, call or text her at 661.444.2735.

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The Audacity of Feeling Good

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Welcome! You have found the place where the miracle creating #5for5BrainDump Process meets the inner working of one’s beliefs and subsequent  otherwise known as “Rewriting One’s Inner Narrative: 5 Minutes at a Time” Personal Growth and Transformation Made Simple!

Now, for today’s writing – 

Last night I had the audacity to feel good about something I created.

Some people might be surprised about how rare this is for me. It isn’t a sweet dissatisfaction I normally feel, but a deep tainted dye that spreads over me – based upon none other than that damn narrative that runs through my veins, “You don’t deserve to do well, you need to seek penance constantly for all your wrong doings.”

I caught my eye in the mirror when I put my hat on for the opening moments of “Kamasutra” – the play I am in that opens tonight. I laughed at my reflection because I looked like Maria, returning to the convent for a forty-year-reunion wearing the same outfit she wore on her way to the von Trapp home as she belted out “I Have Confidence” while riding the bus and skipping along the outskirts of Salzburg.

I only wish my inner confidence matched what I heard last night after my performance. Today, I will be listening to those comments in my mind as I prepare instead of the pesky old narrative patterns.

I will hear “It makes my heart happy to see you on stage again,” and “You are my hero” and “Believable. You were so believable” and “That was so beautiful!”

I was able to feel good about what I created, even if I wasn’t 100% up to the standards I seet for myself.

I was content with the results. I feel solid, ready and confident, like Maria. (The timer went off about 30 seconds ago and I took the time to finish, just because it felt good. And that’s ok, too.)

= = = = =

Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via #5for5BrainDump, livestream broadcasts, creativity playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world.  She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed media artist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people’s creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in soon!

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