Creative Life Midwife

Inspiring Artistic Rebirth

I Knew It Was Arriving Soon: Now, the Day is Here… and we start and continue beginning

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I have been waiting for my facebook memories to cue me, to invite me into the memory – to recognize – to be alert that five years ago my hospital stay began. 

It was the day of my first gratitude list from the hospital where I filled people in on what was going on with me:

The pneumonia wasn’t getting better, so I’m now tucked away in a downtown Bakersfield hospital. I’ve slept for 12 of the last 15 hours after an 18 hour wait on a gurney in the hallway of the ER.

I’m grateful:

1. For patient phlebotomists who are willing to take their time chasing down my shy veins.

2. For Michelle and Julia who have visited and brought Emma with them. This is stressful for her, too. Last night she was very helpful.

3. For technology that brings my favorite relaxation music into the hospital with me.

4. For Miracle Mark Tarango who lit up the ER with his presence yesterday.

If you are in Bakersfield and would like to visit, please text or pm me to find out where I am. I may not be super interactive, and it would be great to see you. Prayers from everywhere are welcome.

The 2024 me is finding the conscious collection and curation of these memories to be fascinating. The self-compassion is infinite now, the me-who-was-in-the-experience was trying hard… and was more than slightly miserable.. was definitely doing her best and taking things one moment at a time.

Today I am going to be putting finishing touches on The Muse Method Project and in my breaks from that, I am going to do some meditative time travel back into my 2019 self in this experience.

I am brave enough. I am ready to step into the full depths of this healing, just as I am ready to complete The Muse Method.

Thank you so much for reading. Your presence means a lot to me.

Julie Jordan Scott hugs an unusual tree
Julie Jordan Scott hugs all kinds of trees

🌟 Creative Life Coach & Muse Cultivator

 🎨 | Award-Winning Writer/Actor/Storyteller

🌱 | Empowering Your Second Act

🎉| New Courses/Programs Coming soon!

🎁   Your presence here makes me feel grateful. 

✍🏻I am a writer first, writing & creativity coach, multi passionate creative next. Writing has always been my anchor art and to her I always return. Thankfully, with great love.

🎯 My aim is to create content here that inspires and instructs – if there is ever a topic you would like for me to explore, please reach out and tell me. My ultimate goal is to create posts, videos and more that speak to your desires as well as mine because where these two intersect, our collaborative, joyful energy ignites into a fire of love, light and passionate creativity.

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Learning from Prompted Free Flow Story Telling on Video Seven Years Later

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Examining a flourising cottonfield and a forgotten cottonfield as we heal in 31 Days of Beginning Again Day 8

It sat on the edge of memory: an abandoned cotton field which I found incredibly beautiful. An Uber passenger who gave me a $100 dollar tip which allowed me to go to the Kern Shakespeare Festival. A therapist I wanted to click with badly and didn’t. Finally, returning to talk to a camera and anyone who later watched some stories I was unlikely to tell.

First: Wasted and Unharvested

I’m standing in a sea of cotton, here in Kern County, agriculture country. The cotton around me won’t be used for anything, which feels like such a waste. It reminds me of how often we don’t use our own gifts and talents, letting them sit idle, full of potential but untouched, unrealized. There’s something deeply personal in that for me.

I’ve never talked much about my daughter, who was stillborn. And standing here, I can’t help but think of the dreams I had for her—the dreams that never grew into anything. They stayed unfulfilled, just like this cotton, never reaching their potential.

It’s strange, isn’t it, how life mirrors the things around us?

A Gumball and Unspoken Pain

There’s something else I don’t talk about much, but it’s been on my mind lately. When I was a little girl, I almost died choking on a gumball. I still remember the panic, the way my mother tried to save me, right outside a grocery store. I haven’t thought about that in years—until recently.

Two weeks ago, in a therapy session, my therapist asked, “What’s the most pain you’ve felt in the last ten years?” And just like that, I felt my throat close up. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak. It was as if the question lodged itself in my throat, like that gumball all those years ago.

It took me two weeks to remember that story, but now it’s all coming back. Sometimes, the past sits there, waiting, until you’re ready to untangle it. And here I am, still processing, still discovering, still learning to breathe again.

The sun is setting now—time’s up.

I had no idea two years later I would almost die and five years after that, I finally felt strong enough to step into the memories completely, to process, to explore and to ultimately get to a new level of healing.

I’m curious: what speaks to you the most from this blog post and video?

Julie Jordan Scott, writer, creativity coach, award winning actor walking in the woods
Julie Jordan Scott, walking in the woods

🌟 Creative Life Coach & Muse Cultivator

 🎨 | Award-Winning Writer/Actor/Storyteller

🌱 | Empowering Your Second Act

🎉| New Courses/Programs Coming soon!

🎁   Your presence here makes me feel grateful. 

✍🏻I am a writer first, writing & creativity coach, multi passionate creative next. Writing has always been my anchor art and to her I always return. Thankfully, with great love.

🎯 My aim is to create content here that inspires and instructs – if there is ever a topic you would like for me to explore, please reach out and tell me. My ultimate goal is to create posts, videos and more that speak to your desires as well as mine because where these two intersect, our collaborative, joyful energy ignites into a fire of love, light and passionate creativity.

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Listening for Meaning: Monday Poetry

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Mining for the stories underneath this pantoum written in August 2010, just before I took my daughter to Smith College to begin her first year there. There was a rumbling of fear in most everything then and this pantoum helped calm me and also helped me find my way for a time. I’m curious to know in the comments what you do to calm yourself when fear is tap dancing around your gut. Please let me know about your solutions and also if any of the lines in this poem particularly resonate with you.

While I have you fear, you are not me.

I am not you. Though if you were I’d slice you

cut you unstitch you and examine you

the scar you left behind, the life birthed

I am not you, though if you were I’d slice you

fear: sticky red gooey tar, sucking my hope

the scar you left behind the life birthed

from the spot after I burned myself free

Fear: sticky red gooey tar, sucking my hope

I take judgment off your glue and look, just look

From the spot after I burned myself free

The core is the same? The core is the same – the same

I take judgment off your glue and look, just look

love: i’ve lost count of the numbered site – it’s you?

The core is the same? The core is the same – the same

White, waiting – wistful fresh-after-rain-morning

love: i’ve lost count of the numbered site – it’s you?

Breath lost at first touch of toe to dewy grass

White, waiting – wistful fresh-after-rain-morning

Knees buckled by laughing tears, “Hello!!”

Breath lost at first touch of toe to dewy grass

cut you unstitch you and examine you

Knees buckled by laughing tears, “Hello!!”

While I have you fear, you are not me.

What interests me most is the talk of a scar from where fear burned me. At first I thought I was writing about the scar on my face, caused by melanoma, but this was written two years before that diagnosis. Once again, it feels like the past me is reaching to the present me to communicate something, I simply am not able to translate it – yet.

Thank you for reading and double thank you for leaving a comment with what resonates most with you about this poem.

Julie JordanScott
Julie Jordan Scott

🌟 Creative Life Coach & Muse Cultivator

 🎨 | Award-Winning Writer/Actor/Storyteller

🌱 | Empowering Your Second Act

🎉| New Courses/Programs Coming soon!

🎁   Your presence here makes me feel grateful. 

✍🏻I am a writer first, writing & creativity coach, multi passionate creative next. Writing has always been my anchor art and to her I always return. Thankfully, with great love.

🎯 My aim is to create content here that inspires and instructs – if there is ever a topic you would like for me to explore, please reach out and tell me. My ultimate goal is to create posts, videos and more that speak to your desires as well as mine because where these two intersect, our collaborative, joyful energy ignites into a fire of love, light and passionate creativity.

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Gratitude: A Premonition or a Passion

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Mirror Balls in Pink and Purple: Gratitude Even when... is it a premonition or a passion?

Going backwards in history, I was stricken by the synchronicity in this day through the years.

In a way it reminded me of WS Merwin’s Poem “For the Anniversary of My Death.” (Link to the entire poem is below the essay, here is the first stanza.)

Every year without knowing it I have passed the day   

When the last fires will wave to me

And the silence will set out

Tireless traveler

Like the beam of a lightless star

Last year at school, this happened: a student who was walking behind me said, “Well you are a miracle.” I had forgotten a student gifted me with that observation.

Two years ago, I experienced the morning after there was a big thunderstorm which morphed into a nightmare that there were tanks rumbling down the street I live on and a war had begun here, in Sussex Borough. I had only recently arrived back at the manse after five months in Bakersfield. The five months were originally a 9 day trip. Instead, I stayed on-and-on, tending to a variety of crises and lending my helping hand and heart where it was needed. I wanted to prove to my family I held them and their needs close, even when I live far away. Those five months were treacherous emotionally and physically and I rose up to each clang on the bell marked “this is yours to figure out.”

I put my head down and figured things out.

A woman hugging a dogwood tree, prayerfully, at Antietam, the Civil War Battlefield

Three years ago I visited Antietam, the Civil War Battlefield and was incredibly moved. I prayerfully hugged a tree during my visit of this historic field I don’t remember learning about, but I must have, right? I would have been taught about the battle where so many American soldiers died?

I wrote a haiku four years ago in honor of a high school friend who decided she didn’t want to live anymore. In the haiku I wrote: “remember to say her name” so today I will say Lynn Oliver’s name, she was the one who had her locker above mine during my sophomore year at Dana Hills. She was a woman so smart and intense, who I was reminded by because I somehow happened upon her mother’s obituary and wondered how her life was after Lynn died.

Five years ago, a few days before I entered the hospital, I wrote this gratitude list:

I am sooooo grateful for….

1. Water.

2. Breath.

3. Friends who push me, one of the most stubborn people on the planet, to do things I normally wouldn’t do. And my children are always my motivating factors. I love you guys with everything in me…. thank you for taking the rough draft of half of my DNA and improving upon it.

4. Emotional healing. God and I were chatting today and if I didn’t know better, I swore I heard an apology: “I’m sorry for the whole pneumonia thing, but there were some nuances you hadn’t explored yet… so…. yeah. Sorry.” With that apology comes my apology to Emma Jordan-Scott who has probably been victim to my intermittent snoring and/or loud crying since about 3 pm.

5. Taking time to physically heal. Resting in bed watching videos tonight instead of celebrating the arts locally.. All is and will be well.

I didn’t realize then how challenging this was only the beginning of the illness, not healing toward the end, but resting until it took it’s almost fatal turn.

Most of these moments were recorded solo, like a lone explorer instead of a delightful collaboration or a partnership to provide support. I learned to lean into a spiritual collaboration in leadership with my highest self which has continued – and continues as do the lessons from these events from five years ago to now.

WS Merwin’s Poem: On the Anniversary of My Death at the Poetry Foundation Website

What lessons are you continuing to learn?

Julie JordanScott
Julie Jordan Scott

🌟 Creative Life Coach & Muse Cultivator

 🎨 | Award-Winning Writer/Actor/Storyteller

🌱 | Empowering Your Second Act

🎉| New Courses/Programs Coming soon!

🎁   Your presence here makes me feel grateful. 

✍🏻I am a writer first, writing & creativity coach, multi passionate creative next. Writing has always been my anchor art and to her I always return. Thankfully, with great love.

🎯 My aim is to create content here that inspires and instructs – if there is ever a topic you would like for me to explore, please reach out and tell me. My ultimate goal is to create posts, videos and more that speak to your desires as well as mine because where these two intersect, our collaborative, joyful energy ignites into a fire of love, light and passionate creativity.

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The Space Between Yes & No is Unknowing + Love – Everything + Nothing

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“In the space between yes and no, there’s a lifetime. It’s the difference between the path you walk and the one you leave behind; it’s the gap between who you thought you could be and who you really are; it’s the legroom for the lies you’ll tell yourself in the future.”

Jodi Picoult

Five years before I waited at home thinking I would be feeling better at any moment,  I wrote this poem:

Lasting revolutions are bathed in silence –

in one moment when everything stops.

Choices wash away, swept into the

tide of “I must I must I can’t I don’t know

how and I can’t and…” suddenly we find

ourselves on our feet off our asses

Standing, wobbly. Saying no. Saying yes.

Saying nothing. Praying. Soundless.

We vaguely hear the breath entering

and leaving our nose, feel our chest

moving up and down, threatening to

heave unspilled tears out with extra human force. 

We swear there is 

so much heat in our blood our

skin will blister.

It doesn’t.

Did I know what was coming five years in the future? Did I know in ten years I would finally be finishing the book?

Did I know the biggest decision of my life was on the horizon? 

Ironically now I have no idea what made me so fired up that I thought the heat in my blood would cause my skin to blister from the inside out.

I sit here now, wondering where any concept of wisdom or brilliance or stunning growth may show up and share some unexpected or hoped for revelation.

It’s coming. 

It’s coming.

This is the waiting time Jodi Piccoult describes.

Where are you in that spectrum?

In the meantime, step back with me to two years ago when I wrote this writing prompt in one sort of collaboration with Brene Brown.

Brene Brown quote to inspire and own our story and loving ourselves through the process

Remember your lens is love. 

When you get upset or discouraged or hopeless, remember: your lens is love.

Write for five minutes. Remind yourself, “My lens is love.”

Repeat the process until you know in every ounce of your understanding.

“My lens is love.”

Julie Jordan Scott, writer, creativity coach, award winning actor walking in the woods
Julie Jordan Scott, walking in the woods

🌟 Creative Life Coach & Muse Cultivator

 🎨 | Award-Winning Writer/Actor/Storyteller

🌱 | Empowering Your Second Act

🎉| New Courses/Programs Coming soon!

🎁   Your presence here makes me feel grateful. 

✍🏻I am a writer first, writing & creativity coach, multi passionate creative next. Writing has always been my anchor art and to her I always return. Thankfully, with great love.

🎯 My aim is to create content here that inspires and instructs – if there is ever a topic you would like for me to explore, please reach out and tell me. My ultimate goal is to create posts, videos and more that speak to your desires as well as mine because where these two intersect, our collaborative, joyful energy ignites into a fire of love, light and passionate creativity.

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Renewal & Restoration: Begin Again

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It is another October – a time we wave goodbye to the beginning of the academic year and prepare to prepare to prepare for the rush of the end of the year.

My heart – my brain – and work as an artist of life nudged me to do the Ultimate Blog Challenge in a new way. A renewed way, a restorative beginning again way. A means of cultivating and curating my stories from the past five years. 

I will be sharing stories/insights/lessons learned from these last five years that have been so incredibly life changing to who I am as a human.

In October 2019 I had a near death experience and while I survived it, there is still unprocessed gunk, some lingering joy and lots of growth edges I have held very close instead of letting them out into the world.

I am honoring the call to let go, to stop holding on so tightly, and allow these stories and episodes and learnings their due.

The Ultimate Blog Challenge allows me the opportunity to focus on my blog and its readers while I reconnect with blogging friends and meet new ones, too.

I’m so grateful you are here, reading and look VERY forward to deepening our connection.

Woman at her desk, drinking coffee, preparing to blog.
Screenshot

🌟 Creative Life Coach & Muse Cultivator

 🎨 | Award-Winning Writer/Actor/Storyteller

🌱 | Empowering Your Second Act

🎉| New Courses/Programs soon!

🎁   Your presence here makes me feel grateful. 

✍🏻I am a writer first, writing & creativity coach, multi passionate creative next. Writing has always been my anchor art and to her I always return. Thankfully, with great love.

🎯 My aim is to create content here that inspires and instructs – if there is ever a topic you would like for me to explore, please reach out and tell me. My ultimate goal is to create posts, videos and more that speak to your desires as well as mine because where these two intersect, our collaborative, joyful energy ignites into a fire of love, light and passionate creativity.

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How Morning Writing Practice Helps Calm the Nervous System & Lead a More Effective Life

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Many of us yearn for a sense of calm and centeredness, especially those of us who may be grappling with mental health challenges. A simple yet powerful tool that can transform your mornings and your mindset is a daily writing practice. Often referred to as journaling, this practice offers a sanctuary for your thoughts and emotions, providing clarity and peace amidst the chaos.

Is your curiosity piqued? Is any resistance rising up? Please continue to read – and at least consider how starting a morning writing practice – a journaling practice – may help you to create a more joyful daily experience.

Benefit one: Unlocking Creativity

Morning writing allows you to tap into your creative side without the constraints of daily obligations clouding your mind. Here’s a three-step method to cultivate creativity through writing:

  1. Free Write: Start with a free-writing session for 5-10 minutes. Let your thoughts flow without worrying about grammar or structure.
  2. Prompt Exploration: Use creative prompts to spark ideas. Write about a dream, a memory, or a what-if scenario.
  3. Reflect and Expand: Choose one interesting idea from your free write or prompt exploration and spend another 5 minutes expanding on it.

Benefit two: Building Courage

For those facing mental health challenges, courage can sometimes feel elusive. Writing each morning helps build this courage incrementally. Follow these steps to foster bravery through your practice:

  1. Face Your Fears: Write about a fear or challenge you are facing. Acknowledge it on paper.
  2. Affirmation Writing: Create affirmations that counteract those fears. Write them down and repeat them daily.
  3. Action Plan: Write a small, actionable step you can take to confront your fear today. Reflect on your progress regularly.

Benefit three: Achieving Consistent Completion

Consistency can be particularly challenging for individuals with mental health issues. A morning writing routine offers a tangible way to experience the satisfaction of completion. Try this three-step method:

  1. Set a Timer: Commit to writing for just 5 minutes each morning. Gradually increase the time as it becomes a habit.
  2. Daily Log: Keep a simple log of your writing sessions. Note the date, time, and a brief summary of what you wrote about.
  3. Weekly Reflection: At the end of each week, read through your entries. Celebrate your consistency and note any patterns or progress.

Simple method to use: The Power of Experimentation

Understandably, the idea of adding another task to your morning routine might feel overwhelming. However, consider approaching it as an experiment. Follow these steps to ease into the practice:

  1. Start Small: Begin with just 5 minutes of writing. Focus on the process, not the outcome.
  2. Be Flexible: Allow yourself to write about anything—thoughts, feelings, dreams, or even lists. There are no rules.
  3. Review and Adjust: After a week or two, review how you feel about the practice. Adjust the timing, duration, or focus as needed to fit your needs.

Creating a Calmer, Centered Life

Incorporating a morning writing practice into your routine helps create a foundation of calm and centeredness. It provides a safe space to process your thoughts, reducing mental clutter and stress. This ritual may become a grounding force, allowing you to approach each day with greater clarity and intention.

Final Thoughts

If you’re navigating mental health challenges, embracing a morning writing practice might seem like “too much.” Yet, by being open to this experiment, you may discover a powerful tool for fostering creativity, courage, and consistent completion in your life. Start small, stay patient with yourself, and watch how this simple practice transforms your mornings and beyond.

Take the first step today and see how morning writing can become a cherished part of your journey towards a more calm and centered life.

What are you saying YES to in your life today?

Julie JordanScott is a Creative Life Coach, an award-winning storyteller, actor and poet whose photos and mixed media art graces the walls of collectors across the United States. Her writing has appeared on the New York Times Best Sellers List, the Amazon best sellers list and on American Greetings Holiday cards (and other greeting cards). She currently lives in a manse in Sussex, NJ, where she has recently finished her most recent book project, hugging trees daily and enjoys having random inspirational conversations with strangers.

Follow on Instagram to Watch exclusive reels, videos, stories and posts about writing and the creative process.

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Today I am Declaring Independence From….

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I, Julie Jordan Scott, declare independence from my inner mean girl and in fact, I declare independence from and will no longer tolerate the behavior of outer mean girls as well.

Women encouraging, supporting, enriching one another has been my normal experience. I will NOT accept self-loathing, deprecation and meanness wreck my life anymore.

Bu-bye Inner Mean Girl. Consider yourself banished.

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What don’t you see? What experiences are you missing because you don’t look again?

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It is only the third of July and it feels so much later in the month than that, probably because two days ago my right knee had another flare up and that caused me to face plant emotionally. 

The good news is I learned so much in these last two days that would have been buried in my lack of awareness and busy, busy, unrelenting busy schedule and sometimes superhuman expectations I have for myself. 

Today my knee is sore, my hip is slightly sore, and I had the best sleep I have had in ages.

When I arrived at my desk this morning, I was without an agenda except for “to settle into” my day and here I sit, gloriously grounded even if the last week iteration of me would have been frustrated with the pace, the ever-expansive me is taking that last week me and holding her close saying something like “husssshhhhh, husssshhhhhhh, you have plenty of time to do all the things you feel like you must get done…”

Normally during the last week of the preceding month I set up the documents for the next month with my regular spiritual practices and my creative entrepreneurial plans.

It is July 3 and I didn’t set up one of my favorite, grounding, off-the-charts-effective “Mining for Storytelling Gold” daily writing practice.

I looked across the screen to my focus mate partner and said, “In this session, I am going to settle in…” having no idea what that really meant and I wrote “Good Morning, Love,” (my daily message to my facebook followers) and then realized I wasn’t ready to start “Mining for Story Gold” because I hadn’t taken the time to set the document up yet.

I then took the one step that changed everything: I decided to start the August document now.

I scanned last year’s August photo album and found the perfect photo.

What I had never noticed in that photo was glaringly obvious now.

What do you see in this photo?

What have you missed seeing in your everyday life lately?

Please let me know in the comments – 

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Welcome, July – Optimistic, Warm-Hearted, Let’s Celebrate Completion Friend

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Happy New Month! Happy Monday!

It may seem odd the simple joy I get from layered white canvas. Monday is a week’s new canvas, the 1st of a month is a chance to do my best, again – though my best differs from time-to-time.

I am participating in the Ultimate Blog Challenge once again. My blog and my website and my business have fallen by the wayside more often than not since… well, for a long time. My biggest July intention includes changing that – I have a plan, I have a method, I have collaborators.

This delights me.

Completion, skating along the infinite loop do loop towards endings and beginnings is a place the blog will document throughout the month. I look forward to meeting new people and spending time with old friends.

There is only one July 2024 and one of my greatest desires is to be able to look back at it and say, “Wow, that was an incredible month of peace, joy, fulfillment and more than I expected.

My biggest completion is I am finishing “Haiku Saved My Life: How the Healing Properties of Courage, Creativity & Consistency Changed Everything.”

I refuse to say “finally” because the entire process was important. 

So much of my life over these last years has been about falling down and getting up that the pace of this project is not setting a pattern for books that take forever – after all, this one took half the time of the last one which I ended up shelving so this is actually progress!

“Haiku Saved My Life” is a braided memoir sharing the tales of 377 haiku writing from the end of 2019 into the beginning of 2021. The reader will be taken on an adventure which opened the door to creating several inspiring bodies of work one small step at a time.

It has elements of inspiration, instruction, poetry and themes of mortality are woven in as well.

By mid-month the plan is to send the final draft off the the book designer – and go from there.

Here’s to a festive, celebratory, project completion extravaganza in July!

Julie Jordan Scott is a writer, creativity coach and creative entrepreneur. She enjoys drinking coffee at her desk as she expands her entrepreneurial circle.

Julie Jordan Scott is a Writer, Creative Life Coach and Creative Entrepreneur who looks forward to a July that expands her work as a writer, speaker, teacher, facilitator and traveler.

She is grateful to be spending parts of July with her.

Watch her reels and images on Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/juliejordanscott/

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