Creative Life Midwife

Inspiring Artistic Rebirth

Archives for January 2019

End the Downward Self Talk Spiral: From Lament to Self Love

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Why do I have to go so deep with so many things? Why do I take a submarine dive into a simple prompt? Why am I compelled to feel so deeply? Why aren’t toe dips in the shallow end enough for me? Why do I get so passionate about certain subjects that I am a weasel who won’t let go and then wonder why some people turn and walk away, shaking their heads

Do you ever hear yourself in a self-talk spiral that finds faults with lament qualities you would enjoy in someone else?

This week has been overly abundant in self-laments and at times more negativity than necessary or appropriate.

  1. Why do I have to go so deep with so many things? Why do I take a submarine dive into a simple prompt?
  2. Why am I compelled to feel so deeply? Why aren’t toe dips in the shallow end enough for me?
  3. Why do I get so passionate about certain subjects that I am a weasel who won’t let go and then wonder why some people turn and walk away, shaking their heads

I had a simple prompt to write about the antagonist for my work-in-progress that I recently finished copyediting and it took me most of the day to come up with a slightly coherent response. Here is a slice of the Instagram post I wrote:

Permission to lament is granted. Healthy boundaries lead to breakthroughs,

I’ve been struggling with this post today as it isn’t easy to say or admit or deal with and then there is this reality that as a writer I am supposed to be able to write easily.

My antagonist in my WIP (almost done, in final edits) is as much an entity as a human, though in my head there is one scene that replays over and over and over again that involves two fully grown men including a school psychologist basically holding my son in a corner while he was screaming and they were standing there with their arms folded “guarding” a six-year-old-boy who was overwhelmed and unable to process what was happening to him/around him.

The school psychologist who ought to have recognized the behaviors associated with autism spectrum, who under the education code was legally obligated to make a referral to have my son tested – in fact, he ought to have administered the tests – was instead standing over him with his arms folded.

Today I have been imagining what that must have been like for him.

I remember arriving on the scene and breaking through the guard barrier and picking him up and setting him on my lap and rocking him as his crying started tapering off because he was being treated like a human again.

And then the person who has impacted me most in this past year and then into the new year is not a single person, but the shattering of my expectations of what is good and right and expected.

My inner wrangling is a reflection of my unmet longings and an opportunity of confessional. Opening myself in soul confession is something that has bit by bottom most recently though at the best of times, authentic confessions have built constructive relationships. Focus on that true memory: authentic confessions build constructive relationships, soulful friends, faithful and vibrant companions.

Suddenly a light comes on above my eyebrows:

I am a complex human who loves well, who is active in a variety of spaces and places. I love complexity, unconventionality and deep connection.

My inner wrangling is a reflection of my unmet longings and an opportunity of confessional. Opening myself in soul confession is something that has bit by bottom most recently though at the best of times, authentic confessions have built constructive relationships.

Focus on that true memory: authentic confessions build constructive relationships, soulful friends, faithful and vibrant companions.

It is with people who are not aligned that I have fallen flat.

Here is to laments and the celebrations that come from the light within.

Here is to the antagonists and the inadvertent transformation they spark.

Here is to me, in my wobbly embrace of my narrative, your narrative and her narrative. It feels so good to find my smile after kicking around in this rubble for a day (which I realize now was a well spent day afterall.)

Julie JordanScott is a creative life coach, writer, poet, Mama extraordinaire and mixed media artist whose greatest joys include loving people into their greatness they just aren’t quite able to realize yet. To set up a complimentary exploratory session, please visit here.

She is so thrilled to announce the next session of the Passionate Women’s Writing Circle is open for registration. Find out more and
Join the upcoming Passionate Women’s Writing Circle which begins again on Friday, February 1. Click for details and to sign up now.

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This Somewhat Sleepy Morning, I Knew: 3 Ways to Be a Mirror, Not a Deflector.

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This morning I dragged my sorry tired self out of bed for the 5 am writers club thirty minutes late. I had been looking at Instagram and reading about ridiculous TV, mindlessness and unconscious floating, but my keyboard was calling and I answered.

With writing sessions like this one, I don’t expect brilliant sentences strung together effortlessly. I am happy with single word repeated, “Intention, intention, intention” might be a good example.

A gratitude list and slight expansion on gratitude is helpful.

Normally I write with lyric free, instrumental music. This morning, I knew I needed an ode to clarion call, a rallying cry, a moment of truth for the words that wanted me to speak.

This morning, though, I was listening to John Mayer’s “Say What You Need to Say” and my fingers found the words, “Best of luck in your next endeavors. Get therapy. Keep working on yourself. Hold up a mirror instead of a deflector.

3 Paths to “How to Be a Mirror, Not a Deflector”

  1. Accept your weaknesses not as enemies but as part of your most important allies-in-the-making.
  2. Move forward with love through aligned passionate action instead of attacking with fear and hate, evidenced by statements meant to push known “buttons” in others.
  3. Recognize your own value from the perspective of those who see you as a whole person, weaknesses surrounded by strengths. Someone dedicated to growing, betterment and adding to the increase steadily.

Julie JordanScott is the CreativeLifeMidwife. She loves creating life changing content to inspire you into passionate action as she has been doing for two decades. Join her upcoming Passionate Women’s Writing Circle which begins again on Friday, February 1. Click for details and to sign up now.

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Your Writing Life: Write Your Love to the World

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Poet Mary Oliver long ago reminded me, “My work is loving the world.” in her poem, “The Messenger.”

This single line in her well-crafted poem has shaped many choices I have made by asking myself, “How am I loving the world in this action I am taking?”

Sometimes I do a slight translation or edit to the original work when I ask “How is my writing loving the world?”

I write for different reasons at different times. Sometimes I write because my words may be of service. I write because I must. I write because I am a better human being when words splash on the page.

Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love wrote: “I write regularly, but in bursts, if that makes sense. I’ve never been burned by writer’s block, either. Writing is my love and my life, but it’s also a job.”

You may be in a couple spaces: you don’t have enough time to write.

You may be in a space where your writing lives within the “I gotta do it, I gotta do it, I must publish this blog post, but wait, there is laundry and my child’s soccer practice and…. Oh, here’s a writing assignment that will pay me $25! Throw all my personal goals to the side to make $25 so I can call myself a pro!”

I know these well because I have lived each and all of them.

When I do my best and my writing is the best is when I think of it as my “work” not “just another crummy gig.”

Each writing job I choose to take is honorable. I am blessed because my work, my writing, is loving the world.

How do you show love to the world through your writing?

How do you show your love to the world through work?

Consider these questions – and consider adding your comment to this post. I so enjoy connecting with you.

Julie JordanScott is the CreativeLifeMidwife who loves creating life changing content to inspire you into passionate action. She has a writing circle starting on February 1 and several other challenges and programs in the near future where you may participate as well.

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Ta-Da! Celebrate What Gets Done

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In December we offered the Bridge to the New Year experience and one of the big a-ha’s was my evening writing practice that evolved into Bullet Journal for Beginners starting with writing a To-Do List Daily and during the day, taking notes in a “Ta-Da” list, Rumi style.

As a creative, it is important to never stop growing.

How do you want to grow creatively in your work life?

Yes – not only in your art life, in your Business or Work or Education life! .

I have this idea to take my Beginner Bullet Journaling and add it with the pleasure of a simple evening writing practice that can make it not only fun for me, but for you, too. Have you watched the video yet?

It will inspire you!

Let’s try it out, together, I’m thinking in a 5 Day Mini-Challenge starting next week. What do you think? If I get enough interest, I’ll put together a few PDF’s and some simple quick hands-on methods and we’ll do some quicky daily method of check in from Monday – Friday and see what happens.

Please comment to let me know your interest.

As I mention on the video, below are some links of places to find me talking about this new practice on social media. It’s genesis was in the Bridge to the New Year: I will link up to that post last.

On Instagram I have Photos, Videos and Lots of InstaStories and Highlights with numerous tips surrounding To-Do’s and Ta-Da’s and all sorts of writing.

On YouTube, you will find writing and video and over a decade’s worth of stream of consciousness me being me and even some ancient “Mommy and Samuel” show and my children when they were little. At the top though there are Journal and Writing playlists to explore along with Poetry and Writing Prompts and some Video/Livestream How-to’s.

I also have a Word Love Writing Community on Facebook you may want to join. It is less formal, a place to “hang out and be” without the need to put on a fancy face… I like to say “Sweat pants and eating pizza straight from the box” is perfectly acceptable here.

Here’s the post where we got started in Bridge to the New Year.

Take Delight in a Daily Practice

Julie JordanScott is a creative life coach, writer, poet, Mama extraordinaire and mixed media artist whose greatest joys include loving people into their greatness they just aren’t quite able to realize yet. To set up a complimentary exploratory session, please visit here.

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