Today’s a-ha roared toward me like a soft scratching on the front door from a long lost pet who found her way home.
I was re-reading a blog post from last January where I wrote:
Why do I have to go so deep with so many things? Why do I take a submarine dive into a simple prompt?
New version: What’s up with me choosing to go so deep with my new discoveries?
Another question I asked on the original blog post:
Why am I compelled to feel so deeply? Why aren’t toe dips in the shallow end enough for me?
What is the gift (are the gifts) in deep feelings? What is the benefit of not being like others, who are perfectly content in shallow feelings?
I have done a lot of personal development work as a part of not only my life work as a creative life coach and even so – I hit mindset roadblocks of limited beliefs on a regular basis.
Working on rewriting my narrative is a standard part of my life.
These questions from “before” – a year ago – illustrate how I was assessing my basic ways of being as somehow wrong. I have been known to call that “wrongifying myself.”
The new versions are aimed at recognizing the strength within me rather than the “what’s wrong”. This reminds me of the ee cummings quote, “It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
At my core, I am a deep thinking, intensely passionate person. Toe dips in shallow water don’t appeal to me. One way I have changed is this: I have gotten more patient or understanding (and at times I may say compassionate) with those who find their deepest satisfaction playing in the shallow water only.
Shallow water lovers are creating the life they are meant to live being their most real selves.
My most real self loves pushing myself into new adventures. My most real self is going to dive into these new questions and see what flows.
Question for integration: Review your blog posts, journals and social media pages to see what you were experiencing or creating a year ago.
How have you changed?
What are you inspired to create now as a response?
To see last year’s blog post, visit here:
END THE DOWNWARD SELF TALK SPIRAL: FROM LAMENT TO SELF LOVEhttps://creativelifemidwife.com/2019/01/
Carrie says
“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”
Love this quote! I believe the power of reflection can change or affirm us. Sometimes I read old posts and wonder if I’m chasing my tail. Other times I discover just how much I’ve grown through the experience.
Lily Leung says
Thanks for the suggestion. I will have to look back and see how I have changed. I am taking a class in Buddhism. What I learned is the ‘self’ is always changing. Nothing stays the same.
Roy A Ackerman, PhD, EA says
Always best to review the progress we’ve made. It helps us create new futures for ourselves.