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Creative Life Midwife

Inspiring Artistic Rebirth

Not on My Bucket List: Growing from the Unexpected Curves in Your Life’s Journey

February 25, 2021 by jjscreativelifemidwife 1 Comment

A bucket list on its side asks the question, "What to think about things that aren't on my bucket list?" and yet they may be significant growth experiences.

Today another item I never wanted to have on my bucket list will be quickly added and crossed off.

A needle will be inserted into my chest to withdraw fluid from a mass of unknown origin. I am hoping it is merely an infection. I am hoping it is not Valley fever. I am hoping it can be excised without much trouble. I am hoping.

What happens to items on our bucket list when the unexpected occurrences we never wanted to happen, happen:

I have not been writing much because having something frightening like this tends to silence my words. Even when I have a lot of stories to tell, the fear hovers. It gets stronger the longer I sit and stew even as I want to talk about it and process it with others.

I have wanted to toss it into conversations about completely unrelated topics even when it makes no sense at all.

A spirited discussion of a well written book is overcome by an avalanche of thought in my head that sounds like this: “what if this thing in my chest is cancer? What if this thing in my chest is a danger to my future? What if this thing in my chest is another chapter in my ‘so close but not quite’ which could very well be the title of the movie of my life.“

I miss the discussion that is actually happen and get caught up in my tangled thoughts.

The anti-bucket list item turns into a quickly turning road going nowhere particularly constructive.

I think of making a rag doll to sleep with, a toddler sized one with brown braided hair and blue eyes, a mini-me who might have matching heart scars to mine. Maybe we will both wind up with non-heart-shaped scars over our collective heart space. Maybe that would be cute and sweet and comforting.

This may be absolutely true and how constructive is this path? Creative output does heal – and is this something I really WANT to do with my time right now or is the idea comfort enough?

Maybe this twist in the bucket-list road would be better?

Last night I found myself lying in my bed in a cocoon of pillows like when I was in the hospital, valley fever no one knew I had, sepsis, organ failure, near death. Last night as I settled in the pillows helped it feel so much better than anything else has felt in a long time. It was cloud-like yet solid, so supported I wished I had someone there to read to me. A soothing voice to read from the novel I am reading or to read pages from the book of Julian of Norwich or perhaps even read about how to create supportive loving habits. 

For now I don’t have anyone to do that but I do have the pillows. I can recreate soft holding support. Yes! Something I can actually do easily.

The end of the road leads to Ralph Waldo Emerson?

I am reminded of the message I meant to send today, the one inspired by Ralph Waldo Emerson.

A curvy road is much like our concerns when we are facing the unknown. The quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson reminds us "Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year."

Today, even after all I have spoken I can still say I am waking up to the thoughts of Ralph Waldo Emerson, he who wrote “Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.” 

You might be saying “This does not jive with what you wrote above this fold – you just said you aren’t familiar with the ‘not tragic’ and ‘I never wanted’ and ‘frightening’ how does this add up to “the best day in the year”?

Quite simple, actually.

I am alive. My heart is still beating. I am able to create as I want to create. I have clean water to drink. I have a future in the works. I smelled almond orchards in bloom last night. I walked this morning. I am writing now. I am able to say what I most want to say.

I am awake on this, the best day of my year so far. And tomorrow, I will live the best day of my year so far because I am choosing for that to be how and what it is.

What if every day was a bucket list celebration?

In the meantime, I will be thinking of some other word for “bucket list” because that is focused on death – kicking the bucket – and after two cancers, a couple valley fever episodes, sepsis, kidney failure – I am all about the living and loving and being with whatever is and choosing the best even when it looks like it completely sucks.

It isn’t about the lessons I am learning, it is about the breath I am breathing and the love I am knowing more deeply every single day.

Julie Jordan Scott is the Creator of the Radical Joy of Daily Consistency Course which helps people practice consistency and completion daily in order to experience a more incredible life experience. She also founded the free, private facebook community for writers and creative people at all levels of experience: the Word Love Writing Community. Join us!

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Filed Under: Creative Life Coaching, Goals, Healing, Intention/Connection Tagged With: Bucket List, Not on My Bucket List

What have you learned from reading so far this year?

February 16, 2021 by jjscreativelifemidwife 5 Comments

What is the most recent book you read recently because you wanted to experience personal growth? In the beginning of the year, self-help and goal setting and improvement books fly off the shelves and out of publisher’s warehouses.

While this may seem like a simple question, sometimes the books that help us grow may be unexpected. Let’s consider different factors and allow possible answers to surprise you.

This week I finished several books. I finished “The Practice” by Seth Godin and “The Nickel Boys” by Colson Whitehead.

When books become friends, they become lifelong companions.

Reading Godin’s book again is like having a reunion with an inspiring friend. I first read him years ago when i was new on the entrepreneurial, transformational creativity path. What I enjoy about his work is he is aligned with me AND he challenges me to think, act and grow better – with purer intention and awareness.

When I finished “The Nickel Boys” a novel about two young men in a 1960’s reform school in Florida completely opened my eyes. I read and actively enjoyed this book so much that I was known to blurt out joy by saying “Oh, this man can write!” or in dismay, “No, I can’t… I can’t keep reading this right now… no,” and walking away for three days until I felt restored enough to face reality.

At the end of the book, I wanted to fill up the trunk of my car with copies of this book and give it away to people who I know would read it because while we – as white people – can use words like “white privilege” sometimes don’t get it because we can’t quite get it clear. This novel helped to clarify not only white privilege, but the heart of Martin Luther King’s message as lived by a group of young men – while at the same time using language effortlessly and not needing to paint violent details.

One book: obvious personal development. Another book, fiction based on history, quieter and also deep in my core soulful personal development. 

Taking a moment to move into a political direction: feel free to step off the post AND please tell about books you have read.

I don’t usually get political here on this blog, but I am about to do so briefly. If you do not want to deal with anything political today, I understand and invite you to simply comment about the above material and know if you are curious, this blog post will stay here for you to consider.

 On the same day I am writing this, reports from the New York Times are telling us a woman named Amy Cooper fulfilled her judge appointed goals after being a typical “racist Karen” when she falsely reported a black man on a 911 call for threatening her because he asked her to follow the law and put her dog on a leash instead of allowing it to run freely in Central Park in New York City.

After she was arrested, she went to court and the judge requested she attend five sessions of therapy and proclaimed better. The educational course of study was specifically about racial bias. 

To read an article that summarizes what happened, please visit this article from the New York Times.

What if the course of study included literature, film, art & heartfelt conversations?

I wonder what would happen if the educational course of study included reading and reflective writing? I wonder what would happen if Ms. Cooper and others  read some books and wrote about what the books meant to her and how she would choose to live those books?

Perhaps we could put people who behave like she did with reading a book, watching a movie, looking at an art exhibit and then reporting back to the world how she grew from those experiences and how she will live differently as a result.

What might happen then?

Maybe we could entrust that reporting to her therapist would make a difference.

With well written, topical works would perhaps be influential upon people like Amy Cooper – and people like us witnessing the broken system and help us move one another and the system into a more aligned place – would learn more than just shouting and flailing and constantly standing on one end of the “us vs them” continuum. 

Please share in the comments your book & reading recommendations PLUS any relevant conversation.

Julie Jordan Scott is the Creator of the Radical Joy of Daily Consistency Course which helps people practice consistency and completion daily in order to experience a more incredible life experience. She also founded the free, private facebook community for writers and creative people at all levels of experience: the Word Love Writing Community. Join us!

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Filed Under: Creative Adventures, Creative Life Coaching, Creative Process, Creativity While Quarantined, Goals, Healing Tagged With: Books, Healing Our World, Reading Challenges

Gratitude: It doesn’t always look like you expect it to –

February 13, 2021 by jjscreativelifemidwife 5 Comments

This morning I was scrubbing the toilet. Round and round I went with the brush, round and round and round. 

I remembered when my son was little and the only way I could get him to allow me to wash his ears was to make it into a game. First we would play the game of washing his hands in the kitchen sink. We would dunk them 100 times in the water and then dry them with a washcloth. We would then get another clean washcloth and wash his ears with gusto and joy, he would be laughing and squirming and I would be grateful for making up this game, otherwise his ears would have gotten horrible and I would have felt like a neglectful mother.

I am grateful I am still able bodied to scrub the toilet.

I am grateful I have a toilet to scrub.

I have had an intentional relationship with gratitude for a while now, but at first, it was not entirely wanted. I didn’t believe gratitude was all that useful.

I knew about people who went on and on about “an attitude of gratitude” and usually they looked about as plastic as the Barbie my daughter played with every once in a while.

Then I hit one of my first rock bottoms on the way to a long sequence of rock bottoms.

I started tracking my gratitude every day and posting it on a now defunct social media meets goalsetting website. I did this for 500 days. Now I use gratitude as the closing to my daily writing practice and teach the same method in the writing workshops I lead.

Ending one’s writing practice with gratitude brings the end of the session to an upswing, something that is often a necessity if the writer has processed a lot of garbage and grit and not-so-pleasant stuff – like most people face when they scrub the toilet.

I’m going to ask you about gratitude – and I want you to pause before you throw down the first thing that pops into your mind. 

What are you grateful for that is underneath what you usually say.

If you are grateful for your child, think about what annoys you about the said child and consider what about that annoyance can you claim as gratitude.

If you are grateful for your home, think about a chore that you don’t like so much and think about what about that chore is actually a blessing.

If you are grateful for the sunshine outside your window, remember the last time you got caught, unprepared for the weather – and what brings a smile to your face from that memory.

Now jot one or two of those items in the comments.

Gratitude, when expressed from your deepest gut places, is immensely transformative.

Julie Jordan Scott is the Creator of the Radical Joy of Daily Consistency Course which helps people practice consistency and completion daily in order to experience a more incredible life experience. She also founded the free, private facebook community for writers and creative people at all levels of experience: the Word Love Writing Community. Join us!

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Filed Under: Creative Life Coaching, Creativity While Quarantined, Goals, Healing Tagged With: Gratitude, Gratitude Practice

Sometimes Opting For Quiet Integration is the Best

January 8, 2021 by jjscreativelifemidwife Leave a Comment

My country went through a depth of experience yesterday I would not have imagined going through until it was happening. Today for most of the day I have been integrating my experience, even here from the West Coast, quietly and grounded, listening to my heart without influence from others.

Quiet is sometimes the best place to be.

It’s ok to go “dark” for a day. It is fine and often appropriate to not speak right away. That’s what I did yesterday. The reports were coming in from Washington, DC and I felt as if I was in a cocoon between my flannel sheets. With the horror I was seeing, I wasn’t feeling any good things. Permission isn’t something we need to ask for here in relationship to feeling, grieving, expressing.

In retrospect I may change my mind about the overall impact of what happened yesterday but right now, I’m not.

Right on Time is Sometimes Not on Time

So I am back, right on time, with a report from today – which happens to be the anniversary of the mother of one of my closest friends. 

What are My Quiet 3 Good Things on January 7, 2021?

  1. I honored myself and my rhythms today. I was intentional and didn’t feel as if I “had to” force myself into anything.
  2. I took action on chores I had been procrastinating about – cleaning out cabinets and clutter. 
  3. I’m trying the new app clubhouse for the first time today. I joined a conversation and I will be hosting my own room this evening. I am not sure how much I like it yet, but it is interesting to listen as I am doing busy work. 

What are Your 3 Good Things?

I would love to hear your 3 Good Things, today or tomorrow or whenever.

You may also be quiet, sad, grieve, complain or gripe.

It’s ok to go dark, even as we are consistently, radically joyful.

Julie Jordan Scott is the Creator of the Radical Joy of Consistency Course which helps people practice consistency and completion daily in order to experience a more incredible life experience. She came to this conclusion after almost dying and coming back to true healing by writing 377 consecutive haiku… and a lot more along her way to building that streak! To find out more about this program, visit this link, here.

She has been a Life Purpose and Creativity Coach since 1999. She has taught workshops in college classrooms, hospitals, teleclasses and webinars with participants across the world.

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Filed Under: Creative Process, Goals, Rewriting the Narrative Tagged With: 3 Good Things Daily, Introspection, Radical Joy of Consistency

Cultivating Memories that Transform Your Life Experience

January 4, 2021 by jjscreativelifemidwife Leave a Comment

May this be a year for transformational memories:

What are transformational memories?

Memories tend to fall into several different categories: the mundane, the memories we want to forget, the bad memories that are burned into our psyche and the mountaintop memories – or big events we work to remember for later in great detail.

Transformational memories are those every day moments that make a lasting mark on who we were in the moment and who we are becoming, still.

Are transformational memories active gratitude, counting your blessings?

2020 may have many transformational memories for you that are certainly not mountaintop memories and they were mundane yet not. This is evidence of the “unprecedented times” we keep hearing about and experiencing again and again and again.

Now we have crossed the bridge to 2021 and although the calendar has changed, we are still facing many of the challenges from before. This series is to stay focused on what moves us forward.

Building a creative streak to practice successful completion

It is also an example of a small “streak” or container to hold a 31 Day Experiment in Counting My Blessings everyday that also is a method of completion practice.

I am a believer in practices like this because it gives you a daily completion, so you get practice in what it feels like to accomplish something simple to do and significant to do everyday. It is nothing short of magical. 

Don’t believe it?
Try this for a week and tell me how you’re feeling.

Three cool things from today:

  1. Samuel started the day shift at his job. No more graveyard. From now on he will work conventional hours and I won’t get to bring his lunch to his bedroom door by special delivery every day. That is a sadness I will just get over.
  2. Katherine got a full-time church job! She will be the Solo Pastor at First Presbyterian Church in Sussex, NJ. I told her today I look forward to the day I can travel again and see her in action in her congregation!
  3. I created a bunch of content for the week to come, ahead of time. “Getting ahead” always makes me happy – now I simply need to get better at batching – working on one task theme for a set amount of time. For example. An hour of making graphics. An hour of writing copy, an hour of scrubbing the kitchen. 

This process also helps me as a part of my evening writing practice, something I have wanted for a long time. As soon as I am done with this, I will do some writing in my notebook, some meditation and fall asleep. 

The TV has been off for 30 minutes and YOU have held my sole focus. It simply feels good!

What are 3 Good Things from your day?

Are you ready to count your blessings? Let us know in the comments!

Julie Jordan Scott is the Creator of the One Small Shift Course which helps people practice consistency and completion daily in order to experience a more incredible life experience. She came to this conclusion after almost dying and coming back to true healing by writing 377 consecutive haiku… and a lot more along her way to building that streak! To find out more about this program, visit this link, here.

She has been a Life Purpose and Creativity Coach since 1999. She has taught workshops in college classrooms, hospitals, teleclasses and webinars with participants across the world.

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Filed Under: Creative Life Coaching, Creative Process, Goals, Intention/Connection, Intention/Connection, Meditation and Mindfulness, Self Care, Writing Challenges & Play

In Doubt of Your Ability to Focus Purposefully?

November 16, 2020 by jjscreativelifemidwife Leave a Comment

Like many, I have had to get used to having my entire family underfoot during this pandemic. It used to be I would have complete days to myself to work on my business and create courses, content and sometimes even write for pure pleasure.

These days, I have gotten grumpier and less fun to be around.

Today, I was ready to give up until I decided to use one of my own writing prompts to figure out how to stay focused and purposeful. 

You can do the same thing.

How can you be more focused, even when circumstances are less than optimal?

Here’s what happened for me: I looked back toward a writing prompt I wrote last week for my coaching clients. I knew it would work!

It started with a quote from poet Muriel Rukeyser that went like this.

“In time of crisis, we summon up our strength. Then, if we are lucky, we are able to call every resource, every forgotten image that can leap to our quickening, every memory that can make us know our power. And this luck is more than it seems to be: it depends on the long preparation of the self to be used.”

From that quote came this prompt:

An autumn scene is the background for a writing prompt directing purpose and focus to summon the creative muses.

Here’s what I wrote in 5 minutes:

I remember as early as middle school when I sat in the back of the room typing away at a typewriter, banging on and on about my passion for music. There I was on a manual typewriter with the clanging return bell and my wild push back with my left hand – music, music, music.

I remember earlier, actually, in elementary school, we had a box for our student newspaper. One day I sat and wrote poem after poem after poem about my classmates. I would write one and submit, write another one and submit, write another and submit.

It was exhilarating.

Back then noise didn’t bother me. In fact as an adult I would spend Sunday mornings in sports bars, writing, while my children were at church. I loved church but I loved writing freely, even in loud bars, more.

So why is it right now I can’t seem to get writing done when it is too noisy in my house, which is where we all are given this pandemic?

It may be because here in the house I am responsible. If something happens, I am the one who feels compelled to jump up and “make everything better.”

I am the “go to for instant solutions.” I am the guide, the champion, the always willing to wake up out of a solid rest in case of a crisis because for Mommies there really isn’t much of a rest.

5 minutes of writing yields results

From there came possible mindset solutions that invited me to take different actions in the future:

Solution? 

Give myself a break for continuing to do my work in the world. Trust everyone here can take care of themselves in case of a crisis, big or small.

In fact, each person in this house will be a better human if I sit back, do my work, and be more grounded in my own mission than constantly worrying about theirs. Figure out the noise canceling headset.

I am now free to choose to have a strong, focused week because our audiences are out there, wondering where to find their next inspiration.

After all, during this time, what do we know, most of all?

  1. We have the power to look within and find solutions there, even with limitations other people have chosen on our behalf.
  2. We are strong and powerful in all circumstances.
  3. We can do this, whatever this particular “hard thing” may be!

Let’s have a productive, focused week. If necessary, return to this rescue writing prompt. Heal those negative, naysaying energies.

Find a supportive creative writing community in our private facebook group

How would your writing productivity change if you received varied, niche driven writing prompts daily – also fiction, poetry, entrepreneur, copy writing and video prompts are offered, join the Private Word-Love Writing Community on Facebook by clicking here.

Julie JordanScott lives in Bakersfield, California in a house too small for quarantine life. She leads discussions on Zoom and is polishing her most recent memoir and some poetry for soon-to-be publication. If you would like her to speak to your group over ZOOM until travel is available again, she would be happy to talk to you about that OR maybe you are looking for a slightly quirky, very open hearted, compassionate and tender Creative Life Coach. She would love to speak with you soon.

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Filed Under: #5for5BrainDump, Business Artistry, Creative Life Coaching, Creative Process, Creativity While Quarantined, Goals, Writing Prompt Tagged With: Creative healer, creative healing, Creative Life Midwife, Julie Jordan Scott, Julie JordanScott, Muriel Rukeyser Quote

Expanding & Exploring Intuition to Increase Your Personal Effectiveness

October 20, 2020 by jjscreativelifemidwife 2 Comments

I can’t remember when I discovered how intuitive I am. I may have been born with an intuitive gift AND I believe intuition is something I have practiced and stretched and grown over the years. I think having a non-verbal only thirteen-months-younger than me brother was extremely helpful in picking up clues from body language and the most tiny changes facial expressions. My empathy factor is also high, probably higher than most people.

That was just the start. Developing the intuition is like developing any skill set. It takes time, effort, commitment and there are times you will “get it” wrong – or not as right as you might like it to be.

For those of you who are intuitive, this exercise and the writing prompts will help you develop your abilities. Some of you who believe yourselves to be absolutely the opposite of intuitive, for today and today only I ask you to allow yourself to open your mind to consider growing your intuitive skills.

Judith Orloff, MD, Professor at UCLA said, “Highly developed intuition is a “secret weapon.” Learning to develop your intuition will make you better at your work, in your relationships and more.

Simple method to practice and develop your intuition now

  1. Take note of hunches you receive. Write them in a note on your phone or in a small notebook. It is important to actually DO this instead of “just remembering.” Jack Canfield explains further “Your intuition might speak to you as a hunch, a thought, or in words. Your intuition may speak to you in physical sensations, such as goose bumps, discomfort in your gut, a feeling of relief, or a sour taste in your mouth.” You may take the notes you make in your phone or notebook one step further by dialoguing with the hunch. Do this by free-flow writing. Don’t plan what you are going to write, just ask the question of your hunch and allow your pencil to move. You might want to start with, “The nudge to call my former friend to talk about reconciling feels uncomfortable and I don’t like it but if I asked the wise old person who lives inside me what they might say is….
  2. Take a specific time daily for quiet time by yourself with the specific intention to tune into your intuition. This may mean taking a 15 minute walk followed by a 5 minute journaling session. This may be meditating for 5 minutes. This may mean yoga followed by singing scales and listening between the notes for ideas. 
  3. Look for connections between seemingly disconnected objects in your surroundings to see what they want you to notice or “hear.” Try it now. Pick up three objects, put them in a row and start “riffing” aloud about them.

An example of how to process Intuition Exercise Results

These were the three objects I chose randomly from my environment:

Meyers Clean Day Cleaner; a coffee pot; the seagull reader (a poetry book I am using as a makeshift mouse pad.)

Possibility One: (First Flash insights using intuitive associations, without intellectual associations)

Be awake when I edit my poetry. (mindful and creative instead of seeing editing and revision of my writing as a chore to rush through)

YES!

This is spot on! Lately I have been writing much more which means I am spending more time in revision and editing. I tend to rush through revision and editing because my intellect thinks it isn’t as fun as the drafting process. 

Possibility Two: Very practical – Remember to buy hand soap when I run errands later today. (This has to do with cleaning and other people – may not make sense to you but it does to me. And yes, I did remember!)

Possibility Three: For this response, I used both my intellect and my intuition and went deeper. The results are brilliant. I will make a note to myself to put this into action:

Take time to enjoy your morning practices. Allow the “chore” parts of your day be as soulful and inspiring as poetry.

How to discover and use your intuition exercise results:

  1. Gather the items and look at them, loosely. In other words, don’t stare them down and shout “Speak to me, objects!” instead allow yourself to simply be curious.
  2. What associations come up almost immediately? Write them down.
  3. Go about your business and return to the objects later in the day or the next day. Now consider not with solely your intuition, look with your intellect as well. What associations or ideas pop up now?
  4. Take note of anything resonant, especially if it has relevance in your ife right now or for a loved one.
  5. Experiment with the intuitive hits (or messages) from your objects. Repeat as compelled. Remember to have fun with this!

Writing Prompts for further exploration

Writing Prompts for Intuition to use in writing and across social media and in business. Profile of a woman with galactic hair - showing a sixth sense of sorts. To access more prompts, visit the Word Love Writing Community

Social Media Posts: Use one of the intuition prompts offered in the journaling section as a caption to a post. Ask your audience what they think. When they respond, be curious rather than “provide expertise.”
 

Video Prompt: Do a livestream video about the topic of using intuition in your business. Prepare for this by writing about a time you used intuition in your business and what happened. You may even do the exercise I used above to develop intuition to practice live. (I have done this before – it is very fun!)

Lifestyle Bloggers: Ask your audience to share their stories of intuition with you. Interview one of them, Q and A style and feature it in your blog, Keep the conversation going to gain clarity about your readers in a different way so that you may continue to offer refreshing content.

Poets: Write a poem about a time when you followed your intuition and things did not turn out like you expected.

Copywriters: Freeflow headlines as outrageous as possible. Just start scribbling, even if they make no sense at all. Set them aside for at least a day or two. When you return, use your strongest editing skill – with an open mind – and see what gold nuggets appear.

Journaling Quotes & General Prompts:

“Intuition is seeing with the soul.”

Dean Koontz

Prompt: When I see with my soul, I notice…

“Don’t try to comprehend with your mind. Your minds are very limited. Use your intuition.”

Madeleine L’Engle

Prompt: My intellect likes to take me down a path of…. and my intuition seems to take me down a path of……. and I wonder what would happen if I….

“Insight is not a lightbulb that goes off inside our heads. It is a flickering candle that can easily be snuffed out.”

Malcolm Gladwell

Prompt: If I started to allow myself to trust my insights more….

For Daily prompts & a flourishing writing community – look here:

How would your writing productivity change if you received varied, niche driven writing prompts daily – also fiction, poetry, entrepreneur, copy writing and video prompts are offered, join the Private Word-Love Writing Community on Facebook by clicking here.

We look forward to writing with you!

Julie JordanScott lives in Bakersfield, California in a house too small for quarantine life. She leads discussions on Zoom and is polishing her most recent memoir and some poetry for soon-to-be publication. If you would like her to speak to your group over ZOOM until travel is available again, she would be happy to talk to you about that OR maybe you are looking for a slightly quirky, very open hearted, compassionate and tender Creative Life Coach. Call or text her at 661.444.2735 to schedule an exploratory session.

She would love to connect with you soon.

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Filed Under: Creative Life Coaching, Goals, Intention/Connection, Meditation and Mindfulness, Writing Challenges & Play, Writing Prompt Tagged With: Develop Your Intuition, How to Practice Intuition, Intuition Exercise, Judith Orloff quote, Lifestyle Bloggers, Social Media Prompts, Social Media Tips

Things That Weren’t on My Bucket List that I May Now Add and Cross Off: Part 1

October 5, 2020 by jjscreativelifemidwife 5 Comments

Years ago I attended a conference where I heard Mark Victor Hansen of “Chicken Soup for the Soul” speak. He told us all to make a list of 100 Life Goals. I dutifully made a list. It wasn’t called a Bucket List then because the movie hadn’t been made yet.

This particular item was not on my list of 100 Goals.

I wasn’t expecting it to happen. I don’t know how I could have possibly planned for it.

I was mad, after all, very mad. Angry because the business, the service department where I had purchased my car, obviously didn’t care about its customers, how dare they endanger me. How dare they?

The gentleman told me the usual company line, “We can’t enforce, we can only request.”

I continued pacing and waited as he turned over the paperwork.

Look, this isn’t a joke. This is real.” I said.

“I don’t want to be person #220,000 or whatever the count is now. I’m high risk, I hardly go into any businesses for exactly this reason.”

He nodded and told me I could wait in the indoor waiting room – inside the stuffy, no-air-circulating temporary building or I could wait outside.

I motioned for the outdoor waiting area and added, “And I want to know where I can go next time to get my car serviced. I don’t want to come back here, to this place where people don’t take this seriously.”

I chose to wait outside, even with the temperature in the 90’s

and less than optimal air quality. At least I wasn’t risking my life in the short run. I wrote and I read. I calmed down.

I received a text message informing me I would get another text when my car service was complete and to text my service writer if I had any questions. The message was pleasant enough. I kept my head down and focused on anything but the sweat on my forehead.

The next time I looked up, I thought I saw my car parked and ready to go. I pulled out my phone and texted my service writer, “Is my car finished? I feel foolish because I don’t recognize it yet.” and added a smiley face.

“Yes,” texted the service writer. “I am just finishing the paper work,”

When he approached, he gave me a very thorough report on my car, like a pediatrician would give to a nervous mother. He added, “I also talked to my co-worker about what he did.” I nodded, trying not to be bitter. “He said he was hot…” and I shook my head and probably rolled my eyes.

“And…” he continued, “I wanted to let you know I take this very seriously.

“I take this seriously because… because I lost my brother.”

I looked across the table at him and heard a sound emanate from deep within my gut. “You lost your brother?” I asked, as if I hadn’t heard. “To covid?” His watering eyes and nodding head were met with my disbelief, including the ancient, universal language moan in disbelief. “Oh my God, I am so sorry I am so sorry.” I said as I cried.

We sat outside the service department as if we were in a bubble. I was sobbing, not worried about anyone hearing me say over and over again, “Oh my God, I am so sorry, I am so sorry.”

We had further conversation for only a few moments that felt like an eternity before he got up and went back to work.

He got up and went back to work.

I stayed in the same space, rocking slightly, like I would if I was comforting a baby, continuing to grieve for someone I never knew.

I eventually got up and started driving toward home, but I pulled over to sit, just sit. I received a text. “Thank you for the conversation.”

I cannot say I know why I am put into such situations though I will say I am grateful I was able to give someone space to speak and be heard.

What a risk he took to speak to me.

I am so grateful he took that risk. “I take this very seriously,” he said.

In those moments we became more than service writer to customer, we became fellow members of the human community. We became a place for sacred listening, a family of two.

Space was held for caring and empathy and grief.

My life will never be the same.

Julie JordanScott, the Creative Life Midwife, is a writer, a poet performer, a Creativity Coach, A Social Media Whiz and a Mother of three. One of her greatest joys include loving people into their greatness they just aren’t quite able to realize yet. 

Julie is also the Creative Director of the Word Love Writing Community. Join us now to invigorate your writing – no matter what it is you are writing – social media posts, journaling, fiction, memoir – there will be prompts and other people there to support you. Right now, we are finishing out 2020 with 100 Days of Wonderful Words. We look forward to seeing you there.

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Filed Under: Goals, Intention/Connection, Rewriting the Narrative Tagged With: 100 Goals, Bucket List, Mark Victor Hansen

Moving Ahead During Uncertain Times with MicroGoals

September 2, 2020 by jjscreativelifemidwife 2 Comments

Micro-goals will help you be more successful. This blog post shows you how.

How do you want to feel about my life – your work, physical health, role as a parent of adult children living at home, role as a community member, and content planning at the end of the next two weeks?

Easily stated, I want to feel better than I feel right now. I want to feel more satisfied with this situation, even if we are still being asked to stay at home and wear our masks in public.

What are Micro Goals: aren’t they just goals?

Micro-goals are classified as a certain type of goal. They amplify the present moment and reward you for being productive in a way that suits your personality and aligns with your vision and values. They are simple and short term rather than complex and long term. One of the keys to success with micro-goals is with their length: you may quickly experience success and naturally feel compelled to continue with that goal or leverage that micro-goal into a bigger part of your plan or vision.

Micro Goals work because they offer fast results and easy success.  Check marks in boxes make us happy.

Examples of Micro Goals:

This morning I worked on my monthly walking goal. I am using steps to measure success and building up to an end-of-January goal: a fourteen mile walk from Ojai to Ventura. 

I have recently restructured this goal because I am speeding up my training, so this micro goal will be increased every two weeks. 

Each day I will aim to meet my standard step goal. If I walk 1,000 steps more, I will reach my “Stretch” goal. If I walk 2,000 steps more, I will reach my “Damn Girl you are a superstar” goal.

I have made an ordinary short term goal fun, humorous, and in chunks is time limited. I have a reward at the end I find ridiculously fui and right now in September, slightly unreachable.

Today, I am helping to motivate myself to continue with other daily tasks as I stride my way into my two-week-goals so that I may more likely reach my next level in my walking goals.

Other micro goals may be trying meatless Mondays throughout the month of September, learning the basics of a musical instrument, writing an instagram post, a story and a reel every day for two weeks. Short, fun, fast success or not. You get to try it out (beyond the “first time”) and decide to continue or modify your goal based on results and data.

I have also found there are often times barriers because I just don’t feel like taking the extra steps, making the additional phone calls or emails, cleaning that drawer out today, fill in your task you don’t want to do here.

A women looks frustrated: she doesn't believe she has to do this task. She doesn't want to do it! Everything is NOT do-able!

For those times when you just aren’t “feeling it” – and yes, they happen more than we might think during “these uncertain times.”

After I finished my morning walking today, I took note of the extra benefits to walking that don’t relate directly to the number of steps I have taken. I wrote this write into the notes section of my phone:

Because I walked farther than I wanted to, the rewards were plentiful:

  1. I smelled freshly mown grass (a favorite smell)

2. I heard a birdsong I had never heard

3. I got closer to the end result I’m aiming for

4. I built more self trust

5. I feel better about myself

6. I was able to say good morning to a man working in the park, cleaning trash.  I imagine he is often “invisible” as he works, I wanted him to be seen and to receive a happy, grateful smile.

7. I prayed for children past, present and future who will play here.

8. I walked on a baseball/softball field, something I haven’t done in years. The simplicity of this made me feel grateful and content.

9. I hugged a new-to-me tree. 

10. When I get home I will write, I will publish, I will scoop up dangling threads, I will choose to be happy.

Trying on a goal is like trying on shoes and clothes and rearranging the furniture. Micro-goals are one way to do this successfully

A-ha moment, in the writing!

I just realized while I didn’t know it at the time, writing an occasional list of celebration when I achieve my goals unexpectedly is a great idea!

Also, when I got home, I did do those tasks. I finished some graphics, I posted to two of my facebook groups, I am now finishing up this blog post. And I have been cheerful the whole time, even making plans with my sometimes reclusive son for this afternoon.

End Result: I felt incredibly accomplished and ready for the next item on my agenda. I have gotten more and more accomplished today – this morning – than I did all day yesterday.

Creating a Successful Micro Goals is as easy as starting where you are:

One simple way to consider what to use as a micro goal, I like to “look out over the future” and ask what I want to see in the next week or two weeks. Then I reverse engineer my way back to the present – and this is where many of my micro goals come into being.

I want to be able to look back at my calendar and say “I wrote my haiku every day, I marketed my business on these social media platforms every day, I made a list of ways to generate income with the skills I have right now.”

A row of palm trees at sunrise is one of the haiku photos I have taken during 2020. Poetry and dailiness has made a big difference for me with Micro Goals.

I started getting serious about the effectiveness of micro goals when I started writing haiku every day. It is a micro goal because the daily task is so small. The length of time, however, isn’t micro at all.

I started writing haiku again and used it as my first goal in a long time because I asked myself this question, which I ask you to ask yourself as well.

What is it that used to make me feel better in the past?

What short amount of time and energy activity has been known to lift you from sadness to joy or at least “an improvement”?

You can go back as far as childhood: recently my daughter has started jump roping again and is having a blast at it – something that brought her alive as a child will help her reach her health goals as an adult AND she is still having a blast!

What do you like to do that will support how you want to feel in two weeks that utilizes what you have at your disposal where you are right now?

Take your time before you answer – and when you do, it would be great for you to join the Bridge to the New Year facebook group where we discuss goals and micro goals all year long as you create your most satisfying, creative life.

Write more effectively and have more fun while you do whether you are creating social media posts, the next great American novel, poetry, a sales page or blog post with The Joy of Writing for Magnetic Attraction, a ten day online adventure challenge starting September 21, 2020 Sign up below:

The Joy of Writing for Magnetic Attraction: Title in a Circle to Set Your Words Free + cursive writing

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Julie JordanScott, the Creative Life Midwife, is a writer, a poet performer, a Creativity Coach, A Social Media Whiz and a Mother of three. One of her greatest joys include loving people into their greatness they just aren’t quite able to realize yet. 

Julie is also one of the Founders of Bridge to the New Year. Join us now in 2020 in Bridge to the New Year to reflect, connect, intend and take passionate action to create a truly remarkable rest of 2020 and start to 2021.

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Filed Under: Bridge to the New Year, Creative Adventures, Creative Life Coaching, Goals, Intention/Connection Tagged With: Fitness, haiku, Micro-goals, Short term goals, Walking, Walking Goals

What Writing Poetry Every Morning at Sunrise Taught Me

July 31, 2020 by jjscreativelifemidwife 6 Comments

Before the end of 2019, I created a goal uniquely mine with one goal: to “have something to do every day that would help me feel better.” I remembered the past, when I would write haiku and post them on facebook before the start of the workday, one friend of mine enjoyed reading them and I enjoyed writing them. The number 377 ties me to writing one haiku – a Japanese form of poetry noted for being short and to the point.

I knew if I made it a difficult goal, I might run the risk of not completing it. I gave myself space to fail AND I knew if I paid attention and made sure I had a guideline to write before a certain time of day, I would have a greater likelihood of success.

In early July I had the idea to do a “sub” goal or a micro-goal. I created a specific intention within the initial one. This time, I was going to write a haiku poem every day at sunrise for a month.

I didn’t expect the potent impact this simple practice had on my life, especially since I had already been writing daily haiku for more than six months, everyday. This new tweak to the goal definitely put the entire project onto a higher playing field.

  1. Micro-goals rock: Small, short-term and do-able goals build confidence and make the process of accomplishment even more fun.
  2. Having accountability via public proclamation is both slightly intimidating and brings about an extra zap of love, hope and optimism. I used my facebook page initially. Now I share on other social media platforms and text to specific friends. During the last week of the month, I also share daily gratitude lists and invite others to share their gratitude lists, too.

Haiku 192 – July 2, 2020

Sunrise at the Panorama Bluffs in Bakersfield, California.

trees hold a secret

golden laces weave their leaves

lone bunny watches

  1. Watching the first light of day is one of the most optimistic acts I can imagine during this particular point of our history. It is something I can trust.
  2. Falling in love with sunrise is akin to falling in love with life, falling in love with the place I live, and falling in love with the people who show up and engage with my posts.

July 14, 2020 Haiku 204/377

A mallard duck family swims in the canal off Brundage Lane in Bakersfield at Sunrise

Urban pastoral

Mallard mama quacks fiercely

distant palm stands tall

  1. Grace is a dear friend who embraces me, everytime
  2. Doing unconventional things will attract attention and odd conversations.
  3. Standing on a creative ledge is inspiring even if we are simply doing it for fun

Haiku 208/377 July 18, 2020

Loco Weed (moonblossoms) blooming at Sunrise beside the Calloway bridge in Southwest Bakersfield

poison loco weed

feels the magnetic charm’s call

time for you to sleep

  1. When there is no boss to create goals or tasks for you, you may become the best task master you ever imagined.
  2. My senses are improved because of daily attention and fine tuning.

Haiku 213/377 – July 23, 2020

A pumpjack (oil well) in North Bakersfield at sunrise.

silent old pump jack

sees another day begin

Skoal can on gravel

  1. When we are prone to documenting how terrible things are don’t get up and witness the sunrise every day.
  2. Witnessing sunrise is a potent non-chemical anti-depressant. Because I am well aware of the current news cycle in order to be an informed citizen, this sunrise haiku practice has kept me grounded and present as an optimistic realist.

Haiku 220/377 July 30, 2020 

Sunrise at an organic citrus farm off Edison Highway and Pepper Avenue  outside of East Bakersfield.

Organic citrus

north of Edison Highway

proud palm trees stand guard

There are two days left for this micro-goal, even though July is almost over. After this, I will be writing seven days of Coffee Haiku, inspired by a friend I made on Instagram. After that, I may return to sunrise because it feels so good to be outside when it is still cool during a hot Bakersfield summer.

Which of these photos and haiku poems resonates with you most?

Woman writing on the front porch of a brick home,
Write wherever you find yourself.

Julie JordanScott, the Creative Life Midwife, is a writer, a poet performer, a Creativity Coach, A Social Media Whiz and a Mother of three. One of her greatest joys include loving people into their greatness they just aren’t quite able to realize yet. 

Julie is also one of the Founders of Bridge to the New Year. Join us now in mid-2020 in #Refresh2020 to reflect, connect, intend and taking passionate action to create a truly remarkable rest of 2020. 

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Filed Under: Creative Adventures, Creative Life Coaching, Creative Process, Creativity While Quarantined, Goals, Poetry Tagged With: Goal setting, haiku, Micro-goals

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